Refusing to settle, ctd

You may recall Kate Bolick's piece in the Atlantic, to which I linked. Amanda Marcotte gives a compelling response:

I would have never thought of myself as a hopeless romantic, but reading endless sad, dry articles about the "marriage market," where people supposedly assess each other like you would a car purchase ("No, I was really holding out for something with a sunroof and post-college degree of some sort") certainly makes me wonder whatever happened to plain old love. Partnering up is portrayed in this article, and in many like it, as the acquisition of a person-object who functions to stave off loneliness and keep others from perceiving you as pathetic. There's very little discussion of that ultimate taboo in American discourse, pleasure.

I don't recall when in my current relationship I whipped out a checklist and scored to see if my boyfriend got a 75 percent or higher. Maybe it's foolish of me to go about it this way, but my primary memories of why I wanted him in my life were that I just really enjoyed his company. I can't be alone in this---people tend to couple up because they've done something wild like fall in love, right?---so why is that a marginalized part of the discussion?